Imperfect Growth

How do you grow to like someone? I never really understood what that meant. In a sense I guess it means to attempt and befriend one by spending a period amount of time with them. But what if it was force-fed and you try your hardest to like someone? Is being fond of someone a natural feeling? Does it just click in an instant and upon realizing that you do have feelings for someone, it just goes smoothly from there? Is it physical attraction? Perhaps you admire his or her beauty on the inside?

The social needs of human interactions requires us to have the need to feel loved, accepted, and part of something. This ultimately creates our self-esteem and builds for a desire for more recognition and respect from others. You know, feeling important and as if your actions affects an outcome motivates you into doing more. This leads us to believe that by having the right encouragement and support, we can reach our fullest potential.

But why is the act of socializing a basic need for society? Because it allows us to survive. It gives us a feeling of security and a sense of being somebody. It makes us grow into the person we will become as time passes giving both direct and indirect influences from people you have met in the travels of life. I gained a lot of positive, as well as negative, influences from those around me. Yet I still have a lot to learn about this intangible, mental state they call love.

My mindset is all in confusion as to what determines a legit relationship. Trust? I guess that's one factor. Comfort? I believe this is also a necessity. Honesty? But what else? I'm pretty sure I'm missing a lot more than this.

I am growing to a person that I've always wanted to become. Wearing a mask to have the ability to befriend others when needed. This facade is not always there however. The people I'm never a fake around is my beloved family and my best friend/girl, Ris. I feel like I can open up to them. Even if it's indirectly, they get a sense of how I'm feeling. From the sound of my voice, the actions I choose to do, the expression I give. Others can see me however they want to see me. I could care less about what others expect me to be. But my family and Ris means everything to me and so, I show them who I truly am.

Each passing day strengthens the growth of my youth in a way that makes me feel so alive when I'm with her...